[The weekend is supposed to be chilly and rainy, and so there's a good chance that you're going to stay inside for most of it. Saturday will be okay. And then you're going to look up and realize that it's dark out. When did that happen? Huh. You'll get through the night okay, maybe make a few phone calls to establish contact with the outside world, but when you wake up on Sunday your apartment will take on that dorm room feel, and you'll stop thinking the space-for-access-to-culture tradeoff of NYC is a reasonable one. You'll think about trying to hook up with some friends to do something, but they live just a little too far away in this weather. And then you'll have to figure out something everyone wants to do. And you really don't feel like grabbing a drink at that bar near John's place, because that's what John always wants to do. Anyway, instead of spending the weekend watching reruns of The Real World on MTV, here are some solitary, mostly indoor activities that will remind you that you are a citizen of the bustling urban center that is New York, without forcing you to engage said bustle in any meaningful way. And remember: being alone is different than being lonely. Is that from a Kelly Clarkson song?]
- Read the first 50 pages or so of Underworld by Don Delillo (they are about this pennant game. And the human condition and stuff.). The rest of the novel's 800 pages are good, and you'll get to them. Y'know, eventually. Once you finish Ulysses and Gravity's Rainbow.
- Donate some money to the ACLU.
- Go see Inside Man. It's good, and it's a movie that loves New York City. See it by yourself. Don't call your friends. Seriously, everyone does it. It's cool.
- Obsess and worry about things that are completely outside your control.
- Download 53rd and 3rd by the Ramones.
- Rent Quick Change. Compare and contrast with Inside Man.
- Listen to this David Sedaris essay (there's like 30 sec. of music at the top of it before David Sedaris starts reading). Where's your copy of "Naked"?
- Chocolate Syrup + Milk + Seltzer? You are a crazy motherfucker. Correction: you are a crazy motherfucker who is drinking a motherfucking egg cream.
- "I like Fever to Tell like a million times more than Show Your Bones." Pretend to have an opinion on this very important subject.
- Buy the Sunday Times. You definitely won't read all of it. It's possible you won't read most of it. Hell, you might not read any of it. But, boy, is it huge.
- Troll around Forgotten NY. It's a great website with a lamppost fixation.
- Read Jonathan Lethem's Motherless Brooklyn.
- Practice saying "drawer." It's not "draw-er." It's "draw." Or, if you're feeling outlandish, "draw-uh." Really hit that "w" in there.
- Rent Metropolis. Did you know that Fritz Lang conceived of the film after seeing New York's skyline? You can bring that up on Monday when you casually mention that you watched Metropolis over the weekend, you pretentious dick.
